It was 11 minutes passed the twelve-hundred hour when I decided to put on my long johns, my overalls, popped my ADD pills and set foot in my deep-sea-of-beer accoutrement. I was on a mission. “Must find yellow snow” I kept thinking to myself. I kissed my wife, hugged my 19 year old and headed out to my ship; a 2012 Dodge Journey equipped with only the finest navigating equipment; my iphone. Moments later, as I was about to depart for this uncharted territory where LCBOs occupied places once home to… well, nothing in particular, Lisa opened the passenger door and said; “Let’s go, I want to hit Anthropology first, then we can eat”.
And just like that, poof! My imaginary venture vanished, crumbled under the weight of her words and was crushed into infinitesimal particles of what seemingly could have been the most exciting day dream that only fiction could provide.
But then, suddenly, my wife, killer of day dreams, pointed out an LCBO right next to a parking lot filled with similar ships. “Eureka!” I shouted. Wifey redeemed herself. My day dream was now back in full motion. I was possibly, able to complete my mission. Would I find Yellow Snow? Who knew, only a man of my stature could asses such a possibility? I penetrated the zone and walked over to the beer section… There it was, in a 6 pack format; Rogue’s Yellow Snow. With much effort, at the end of my strength and grasping for a last breath, I reached and grabbed it, then passed out.
Okay, I didn’t pass out.
This could only mean one thing. I had been wrong about the LCBO. Years of training, discipline and study had failed me. I was conquered by arrogance and pretention. What a shame, what a tragedy, I couldn’t face myself. I couldn’t stand the great decorum that hung from my uniform… In an effort to self-punish, I reached to my chest and with great determination, yanked a medallion off my uniform. I needed to demote myself. But, as I pulled hard, I remembered… “I never had any medals”, all I ripped out was a healthy handful of chest hair. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh -the pain, the horror!
That being said, my last couple of posts expressed a slight disappointment in the LCBO’s Christmas and winter beer selection; all apologies to the LCBO. Turns out the inventory differs a great deal from one location to another. Further, not only did I find Rogue’s Yellow Snow, but I found a few more Holiday beers including… wait for it… Holiday INNIS & GUNN! Ah blog of mine, if this was paper it would be watered with tears of joy. A Holiday Innis &Gunn, wow!
Give me a few days and I’ll write up a couple more reviews on Rogue’s Yellow Snow, Pumpkin Patch and a few more jewels I collected during my excursion.